Dr. Phil Episode Notes: Born To Rage?
Here are my notes for today’s Dr. Phil episode, entitled: Born To Rage?
Segment 1
Summary: Three volatile guests on the show today that may have what’s know as the warrior gene, a genetic component that predisposes people who have it to angry and aggressive behaviors. Among these guests, Lori refers to herself as “the Tasmanian devil” because she angers so quickly and extremely. Bryan, another highly explosive guest, abuses his girl friend when he “goes off.” Finally, Scott Long appears, who has been dubbed the biggest bully on the Big Brother show. These folks are seeking help from Dr. Phil to learn to better manage their anger (anger management).
Dr. Phil mentioned a DNA test for a warrior gene that’s available. This gene has been linked to angry and aggressive behaviors in some who have it. Perhaps as many as one third of men have this gene in their DNA. It’s rarer in women however. This gene has been accepted as evidence in at least one murder trial. People with this gene are predisposed to become more angry when treated poorly.
The first guest is Lori, who describes herself as a Tasmanian devil. She claims to become so enraged that her heart speeds up to feverish tempos, her hands perspire, her eyes begin batting and wildly moving around, They showed a clip of her clearing an entire table by pulling out the tablecloth. She realizes that people fear crossing her because of her typical but extreme reactions. Even the smallest of irritants really fires Lori up, like when someone cuts her off on the road. She controls herself when her kids are nearby however, to prevent them from learning this behavior. She’s looking to Dr. Phil to help her manage this anger better (anger management).
Raeja appears who is a friend to Lori (I think) and she confirms everything Lori has said about her rage problem. She says that Lori MUST win; she can’t let an argument go until she’s thoroughly convinced that the adversary understands her point and either succumbs to or at least acknowledges it.
Dr. Phil suggests to Lori that she does appear to have some degree of control over her rage. He cites one incident as example of this control, where Lori, while in the midst of beating up one girl, said to her friends, “when I’m finished with her, you’re next.”
In the next segment, a couple who is in trouble because of the man’s anger issues, will join Dr. Phil.
Segment 2
Bryan breaks phones often when enraged, can claims to have snapped apart 28 of them. He says he gets so mad sometimes that he actually sees red. He blames his girlfriend for judging him too harshly because he has an anger management problem. He’s crying, and says that he really likes his girlfriend, but does not know why he becomes so rapidly incensed so often.
Bryan’s girl friend Lindsey says that she’s afraid to advance their relationship while Bryan remains so volatile. He swears and yells, hits his hands together while arguing his points, puts her down, and verbally as well as physically abuses her. Bryan has broken her foot with a board and bruised her arm by throwing things at Lindsey. She worries that his aggressive behaviors will escalate. Lindsey says that Bryan says things that he knows are deeply hurting to her.
Dr. Phil asks Bryan if he thinks that he’s dangerous, and advised Lindsey not to proceed to the next level in their relationship until Bryan gets himself under control. But he also advised her not to cast him away forever either, as this situation can be corrected. He respects Bryan for having the courage to come on national television for help. This rage is not caused by external stimuli, but rather, originates inside of Bryan. He says, “Anger is an outward manifestation of hurt, fear, or frustration.”
Next: A guest appears who is known as “one of the biggest bullies ever on the reality show Big Brother.” They’ll discuss how to tone down anger and perhaps how to keep it from happening in the first place.
Segment 3
Dr. Phil says that this warrior gene is no reason to allow one’s self to become excessively angry. Genes in general indicate who may have specific characteristics. But they do not dictate that someone will definitely have the traits associated with them. So even though someone may have the warrior gene, this does not mean that anger in that person is inevitable. He mentions the availability of a DNA test to check for the presence of the warrior gene.
Scott Long and his girl friend Tia are the next guests. Scott has the bad temper, and is the fellow mentioned above from the Big Brother show. They show footage of Scott listing the numerous triggers that fire him up. Once, a bus cut him off. So he pulled in front of it, got out of his car, and then proceeded to beat on the bus with his fists. He’s been in bar fights, and blames his behavior on the warrior mentality when he seems to feel is both admirable and prolific in males. Scott Long seems to believe that he has this duty to correct someone whom he believes has made an error at Scott’s expense. Scott wants to know how to “choose” not to get angry.
Tia fears his rage. So she avoids arguing with him about anything. She’s concerned for Scott’s safety; fearing that in his rage, he’ll anger someone else who in turn, might hurt Scott. When she spots Scott’s anger brewing, she tries to gently call him off.
Dr. Phil advises to choose not to be angry and to walk away from the infuriating situation. He wanted to know who appointed Scott as the supreme judge of rightness. He also suggested that when someone does something that makes us angry, that we should not immediately become enraged, because we do not know the person’s circumstances.
Next: They’re discussing how the one predisposed to anger can control it, and more about the warrior gene.
Segment 4
Bryan says he gets so mad sometimes, that he “blacks out.”
Dr. Phil says that a cause of what upsets all the guests on the show today is the belief that their “expectations have been violated.” This is akin to Albert Ellis’s “musterbation” concept, in which people believe that things must or should be a certain way to be right, and when not, the musterbating people become enraged. He says to Scott and Lori that it’s not up to us to decide who should and should not be driving. He says that anger may stem from insecurity in one’s self. When one is safe and sound in who he or she is, then it’s much easier to put up with actions that would otherwise generate anger. He advises the guests to change their world anticipations so that they’re not expecting so much of what the world is not giving them. Getting angry at others makes it hard on ourselves, as others will resist helping us if they think we’re angry at them.
A court-approved anger management counselor named Shannon Munford appears on the show. He says that there’s a difference between assertiveness and aggressiveness. Assertiveness is okay; aggressiveness is not. Aggressiveness contains the elements of anger and condescendence. He wants to show Lori how to assertively get what she wants without repelling people. You can be assertive without crossing the line into aggression, and offending people. He says that anger is a “secondary emotion,” and so, when you display anger, you’re not communicating what you actually feel (hurt, frustration, fear).
All the guests admit that sometimes, they inadvertently (or at times purposefully) do things that might anger others; they admit to being imperfect themselves and acknowledge the absurdity of expecting others to always behave perfectly.
Segment 5
Dr. Rose McDermott appears. A political scientist at Brown University, she coauthored a research study regarding the warrior gene. She says that traumatic experiences in childhood may trigger expression of the warrior gene. She says that learning impulse control can counteract the propensity toward anger attributed to the warrior gene.
All guests appearing today (Lorri, Bryan, and Scott) have tested positive for the warrior gene in spite of it occurring less often in women.
Lori is relieved that now she has some sort of answer for why she so easily grows angry.
Bryan says he had a nasty time growing up, and is relieved as well to learn that he’s not crazy.
Scott Long is glad to learn that he has the warrior gene, quipping that “it explains everything.”
Dr. Phil cautioned that having the warrior gene is no excuse for behaving like a warrior in civilized settings. In spite of the presence of this gene, one can indeed control his or her anger; it just may be a bit harder to control. But nonetheless, we can learn to control the anger, warrior gene notwithstanding.
Next, Dr. Phil reveals how to test yourself for the warrior gene.
Segment 6
There’s a DNA test kit available to check for the warrior gene. Details are at Dr. Phil.com.
Lots of people have this gene but are not known for their anger.
Dr. Phil advises Bryan that Lindsey would leave him if he doesn’t treat her with less anger. Having the warrior gene is no excuse for anger. In fact, it implies that the person with it might have to try even harder to control his anger.
Segment 7
Dr. Phil thanked Dr. Rose McDermott and Shannon Munford for their consulting on the show today. He also thanked the DNA testing company Family Tree for running the tests on today’s guests for the warrior gene.
That’s the end of the Born To Rage? episode. Take care.